Dealing With An Irresponsible Partner
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A partner in life is someone you share your life with which makes your decisions his decisions too, and his decisions your decisions too. But what if you have a partner that is totally irresponsible and doesn't do things right? Will every bad decision he makes becomes my decision too? When he decides to be irresponsible on certain things, does that make me irresponsible too for not taking over the situation?
It's really exhausting to be in a relationship when you feel like you are always the one who is expected to take over things and be in charge of everything. While your partner right there is relaxed, sitting pretty and not doing his part as the partner he should be by being totally insensitive and irresponsible on things. May it be because he is so disorganized and he expect meto follow his trail of clutter in the house. Or it could be as simple as making a decision for us and this family but he couldn't even make a good decision for himself. These are just a few of the million things why I think my boyfriend is irresponsible, I'm sure married women or girls in a serious relationship with their partners can relate. But ladies, it is also important for us to check on ourselves once in a while. Before making any conclusions and judgements against your partner try analyzing yourself first before over analyzing him. While I still think that my boyfriend is irresponsible most of the time, I also know that I am not perfect and that I have my misses too. It's not like I am always responsible and he is always not. So I talked to him, we had a good talk over a cup of coffee and dessert. I expressed to him properly how I felt and what I think he has been doing and has not been doing so far in this relationship, for us, and this family. While most of our problems are usually because of our clashing personalities, I discovered that it is just so important for a couple to spend time with each other, talk calmly about things, and express any problem that might cause bigger problems in the future. So I guess the conclusion here is communication, it is a key for a happy and more understanding relationship. When couples understand each other better that's where the partnership comes in. Partnership to me is a give and take thing, it's by being strong when the other is weak, doing things he can't do for himself while he does things for you that you can't do for yourself. To be a partner for each other is to complete the missing piece of eachother's puzzle, not to be overly dependent with one another but to improve each other's life because you are together.
NOTE: I am not a couple therapist or a relationship expert. I express things based on my personal experience and how I managed to cope with it. While things I say here are mostly based on my personal opinion, but I read articles from Dr. Gary Chapman the writer of The 5 Love Languages and Dr. Prem of drprem.com. The website thecoupleconnection.net has also been helpful for us, most articles are designed for young couples and couples who are just starting to build their own families.
